Event:2015/05/28 Delegates Meeting

Omni Delegates' Meeting - Thursday May 28, 2015

The meeting begins promptly at 7pm, every Thursday, and ends promptly at 9pm, unless delegates agree to continuation. Contents:

• Introductions
• Announcements
• Working Group Report-Backs
• Proposals
• Discussions
• Action Items
• Tabled
• Optional Breakout Session

• = Attendees =

• Yar (Sudo)
• DK (Black Hole, Sudo, BAPS)
• Jenny (Sudo)
• Victor from Brasil
• Lea (BAPS)
• Niki (BAPS, La Commune, Sudo)
• Jesse (FNB)
• Ryan (Sudo)
• Jim (FNB)

Quorum? Yes!

• Facilitator/s: yar, dk

• Introduction to the Omni Commons & our values:

• Explanation of hand signals:
  • "deaf applause", "raised hand", "point of process", "direct response", "time's up", "stop and reflect", "kermit" (wildcard), etc.

• Stacktaker: David K
  • Explanation of progressive stack: Raise your hand and make eye contact with the stack taker. Please wait your turn, and try not to interupt or speak over others. Direct responses are allowed only as Points Of Information/ Clarifications, etc (use hand signal). For everything else, please raise your hand and wait your turn.

• Timekeeper: Niki
  • Reminder to keep comments brief.

• Notetaker/s: Niki / Yar / Jenny
  • URL of this pad: https://pad.riseup.net/p/omninom
• Important Note for the Pad:
  • Please do not move or delete meeting notes from the pad, unless you have archived them properly. Always leave the most recent meeting's notes, and the template at the bottom. !! Thank you.

• Vibe Reader: Ryan
  • Reminder to stay calm, be respectful, and think before speaking.

• Next weeks facilitator(s): Jesse + ?
  • Encourage someone who hasn't facilitated before. If they'd like support, someone who has facilitated before can join them to facilitate together! If they'd like to know how the agenda works, here's a page outlining the different parts of our agenda: https://omnicommons.org/wiki/Facilitating_General_Meetings_Tips_and_Info

• == Delegates ==

• BAPS: lea
• Black Hole: dk
• CCL: inactive
• FNB: jesse
• La Commune: niki
• MPM:
• Sudo Room: yar
• TIL: inactive
• Phat Beets: inactive
• OptikAllusions: inactive

• Quorum: yes

• == Introductions ==

Please be brief! Introduce yourself: Name; Prefered Pronoun; Affiliation; If you are new, what is one thing that brought you here?

• Optional Ice-breaker:
• yar; sudoroom; humming the theme to tchaikofsky's 6th symphony
• dk; baps, black hole, sudo; the descendents
• jenny; sudo; river (joni mitchell)
• victor (visiting)
• lea; baps; kurt cobain
• niki; lc/sudo/baps;
• jessie; fnb; modest mouse
• ryan; sudo; fortune days
• jim; fnb, annex of my life

• = Announcements =

Any Omni-related announcements. Please be brief! Maximum 1 (one) minute per announcement. Reminder: Working Groups reports are after this, please save W.G. announcements for later.

• Need help planning Omni FUN party!
• opal film festival tomorrow
• work on south wall continues
• Jim needsa new computer, wanted to ask Sudo if there's one he can have

• = Working Group Report-Backs =

Please be breif! Maximum 5 (five) minutes per W.G. WGRBs are Alphabetical; All W.G.s are equally important. Report-backs consist of answering 3 (three) questions:

• What did you accomplish this week?
• What problems or action items are you currently working on?
• What do you need to bring to our attention and/or need help with?

Building, permits, and Facilities

This group needs help; https://omnicommons.org/lists/listinfo/building Ballroom-readiness needs and plans: https://omnicommons.org/wiki/Ballroom-readiness

Challenging Domniant Culture (CDC)

Meetings:Sundays at 12pm

Commons

Meetings: Saturdays at 1pm

Communications / SysAdmins

Meetings: nope :)

Finance

Meetings: Wednesday at 7pm

Fundraising

Meetings: Mondays at 7pm, BAPS Classroom

Kitchen

Meetings:

Welcoming

Meetings: Thursdays at 6pm

Proposals

Please provide the following information with your proposal:

• The date the proposal was put on the pad;
• The group or person making/bottom-lining the proposal;
• Who will be speaking to the proposal at the meeting;
• Where the full text or other information about the proposal can be found, if it's not all here.

Proposal re: Pidgein and Centi

Submitted by Jenny (Conflict Steward) and Niki (Mediator) on 5/21:

Summary

With regard to the Omni Commons community, the relevant elements of the conflict between Pidgein / Violet and Centi that have occurred in the Omni Commons space and that affect (implicate) the Omni Commons community include:

First encounter between Centi and Pidgein / Violet in La Commune (on last day of Omni Commons fundraising campaign) Centi attempted to request mediated intervention from Jenny prior to the initial confrontation, but she was unavailable at the time. Pidgein / Violet publicly confronted Centi with accusations that he was complicit in cis-supremacy by standing aside when Pidgein / Violet was beaten by another housemate at a group house they shared together at one point in the past. Ongoing interactions between Centi and Pidgein / Violet in Omni Commons The first round of mediation concluded with a shared agreement of total non-engagement between the two in the Omni Commons space. Centi upheld his end of the agreement in the face of continued escalating microaggressions by Pidgeon / Violet, at which point he approached Jenny to ask for continued mediation and action to protect him in the space. Addressing Pidgein / Violet's specific actions, Pidgein / Violet was asked to stay away from Omni Commons for one month in order to discourage the harassment of Centi. Month-long temporary ban of Pidgein / Violet ends, Pidgein / Violet returns to Omni Commons Upon return to Omni Commons, Pidgein / Violet directly confronted Centi during a work session at Omni Commons for a conference to raise awareness and supporting Political Prisoners. Pidgein / Violet claims someone, namely either Centi or Mitch, stole a wallet and laptop from her bag. Gerald asked Pidgein / Violet why she would leave her belongings unattended and never answered this question Pidgein / Violet disrupted the activities of many people in Omni Commons at this time, and was asked to leave.

Outside of the Omni Commons, the conflict between Pidgein / Violet and Centi has a long and complicated history. The root of it as first described by both parties in a stewarded mediation with Ryan Rising as mediator and Jenny Ryan as conflict steward involves a shared housing situation (outside of omni commons) in which Pidgein / Violet was forcibly removed from that external community.

The conflict between these two people escalated in the Omni with Pidgein / Violet publicly accusing Centi of not speaking up in the face of cis-supremacy during this earlier incident in the shared housing situation. Centi approached Jenny in the space just prior to sensing that a conflict was about to erupt, but she was unavailable to advise in the moment. A heated argument between Pidgein / Violet and Centi followed and both were asked to take it outside. At this point Jenny spoke with both parties and agreed to act as the conflict steward, reaching out to Ryan Rising to act as mediator.

Jenny and Ryan first met with Centi and two of his housemates at the end of January. The three of them recounted the incident and ensuing harassment by Pidgeon / Violet. Ryan and Jenny then met with Pidgein / Violet two days later, who recounted the incident from her point of view and abusive behaviors by two of Centi's housemates.

The incident outside of Omni Commons:

The 11 housemates had an accountability session in which they asked Pidgein / Violet to move out. The house was visited by a city inspector, after which point Pidgein / Violet was asked to leave three times. Pidgein / Violet refused to leave.

Pidgein / Violet brought two friends, A and B, with her when moving out who both had issues with residents in the complex. One of those friends, A, punched one of the residents, X (not Centi), in the face repeatedly, and at that point, X began to beat Pidgein / Violet. Pidgein's / Violet's primary accusation was that Centi stood aside and did not defend her during this incident.

The accusations: Pidgein / Violet claims: Centi did not have her back in the face of cis-supremacy and violent abuse. Centi assaulted Pidgein / Violet by hugging her for too long against her wishes. This claim brought up only after May 5th (after month ban). Centi claims: Pidgein / Violet has continued to harass him both in the space and out. Pidgein / Violet took photos of Centi at social services offices. Pidgein / Violet tweeted at the twitter account of Centi’s housemate, Z, with claims they'd hired a transphobic enabler. A mutual friend told Centi that Pidgein / Violet was making death threats toward the house on her Twitter account.

The demands: Pidgein / Violet demands: Centi be banned from the space. Centi demands: Not to be forced to engage or converse with Pidgein / Violet To be able to be in a public space with Pidgein / Violet without being harassed To engage in mediation with Pidgein / Violet if necessary.

First mediation: At this point (February 2nd), Ryan and Jenny attended a CDC meeting asking for advice on how to move forward. We discussed how responses to violence often looks strange, as well as the Omni Commons community's role in mediating conflicts that occurred outside the space. We also discussed what constitutes abuse (does not acting in the face of violence constitute abuse? 'Sometimes,' was the conclusion, but not in this case). We discussed the need to assert power and be heard in the community, and one suggestion was making a statement that we don't ban people for not acting.

Notes from this meeting: https://omnicommons.org/wiki/Event:2015/02/01_CDC_Meeting#Conflict_w.2F_Pidgein_and_Senti

Ryan and Jenny then met with Centi and Pidgein / Violet together in the Omni Common's treatment room. Pidgein / Violet requested accountability for those who attacked her and that they educate themselves on dynamics of power in anarchist communities.

Centi asked that Pidgein / Violet stop harassing him, saying that an accountability session had been held with Pidgein / Violet at their shared house and went so badly that no one wants to deal with her anymore.

They then agreed to a pact of total non-engagement with each other while in the space.

What happened next: Centi claimed continued microaggressions by Pidgein / Violet when he (Centi) was in the space. He did not approach Jenny until rotten eggs were found in his backpack after both had been working on the public terminals in sudo room. After speaking with several community members who'd witnessed Pidgein / Violet's continued provocation of Centi in the space, including a threatening note left on the door of the upstairs bathroom while Centi was inside, written in Pidgein / Violet's handwriting, Jenny determined that Pidgein / Violet needed to stay away from the Omni Commons for one month. While in the space the next day, Elliot confronted Pidgein / Violet about the rotten egg incident, who denied the accusation. After touching base with Jenny, Elliot told Pidgein / Violet she had to leave and was banned for one month.

Three days after Pidgein / Violet's return to the space, a conflict went down between Pidgein / Violet and Centi and Mitch, witnessed by several community members including Matt, Niki and Gerald. Elliot had confronted Pidgein / Violet about being in the space telling her that she was banned. Niki intervened on Pidgein / Violet's behalf explaining to Elliot that the ban had been for one month and that the month was now up. Pidgein / Violet antagonized Elliot by gloating.

Shortly afterwards, Pidgein / Violet claimed that her wallet and her friend's laptop were stolen from her bag which was proximate to Centi and Mitch, who were working with Gerald at the time to organize the political prisoners conference at Qilombo. At this point, Niki stepped up to replace Ryan as mediator with Jenny as conflict steward. All involved parties were asked to temporarily leave the space.

Niki and Jenny then spoke with Centi about the accusations, who claimed he had no idea what Pidgein / Violet's bag even looked like and that Pidgein / Violet had left the building that day 'beaming with joy'. Then they spoke with Pidgein / Violet, who said Elliot had been making threats, accusing Pidgein / Violet of telling lies about others, and said "stop fucking with peoples shit or I'll make something happen," referring to a group of trans people wishing to run Pidgein / Violet out of town. Pidgein / Violet also stated at this point that she had previously been assaulted by Centi, claiming that Centi had hugged her against her wishes some months ago. When this was brought up with Centi in a mediated conversation with Jenny and Niki, Centi confided that the two had hugged many times, but that he'd never been told that any of these hugs were unwanted. At this point, Centi requested that Pidgein be banned from the space. Jenny and Niki asked Pidgein / Violet to stay away from the space until the issue could be brought to the next scheduled delegates meeting, in two weeks time. Niki told Pidgein / Violet she could come and speak her case and was encouraged to bring allies to the meeting to provide support.

Jenny spoke with Centi the next day, who expressed discomfort with the process of both attending the meeting. Jenny at this point realized that the proper next step should be her and Niki sharing the facts of the conflict with the delegates and making a decision without Centi and Pidgein / Violet present, and told Centi she would ask Pidgein / Violet not to come to the delegates meeting. Then life intervened and she totally failed at that commitment. The issue was not put on the pad and delegates were not notified that it would be discussed at the meeting. Pidgein / Violet came to the delegates meeting on May 21st, accompanied by three allies. See the meeting minutes for what ensued: https://omnicommons.org/wiki/Event:2015/05/21_Delegates_Meeting#Bans

Suggested outcome:

All of those who have participated in this conflict resolution process humbly and readily admit our own limitations in addressing and responding to complex situations of conflict. We assume that oppression is intersectional, and neither simple nor easy to address. However, it is our duty as a community to act in good faith, to the best of our ability, to try to listen, understand, and engage in paths to resolution, healing, and interdependence. In this specific conflict and situation we contend that we have tried our best to live up to our visions and principles as a community. We believe our understanding and assessment are reasonable. We support our conclusions based on the simple facts of this case, and the following is our suggested outcome:

Not wanting to make assumptions as to the veracity of Pidgein's / Violet's claims of having been the victim of abuse, we can only make a recommendation based on the behaviors within the space and in regards to the the impact that they have had on the larger community of those involved in the conflict following mediation.

Pidgein / Violet does not appear to be concerned with the trauma that others involved in the conflict have experienced nor with the trauma that continued violent engagements in the space cause those around her.

Pidgein / Violet has been banned from several community spaces in the bay area, including Noisebridge and Qilombo, and several community members have reported a history of false accusations.

This community is dedicated to making the space safe for survivors of violence and that must extend beyond those who are engaged in any particular conflict. While we do not expect survivors to police their reactions when faced with their abuser, we, as a community cannot allow individuals to repeatedly engage in violent, traumatizing behavior and ongoing microaggressions and provocations in a public space in which many individuals are themselves survivors of violence and abuse.

We are recommending that Pidgein / Violet be indefinitely banned from the space at this time. Additionally, we support Pidgein / Violet and her supporters’ efforts in working together to identify models for community accountability that could be implemented in large community spaces such as the Omni. We welcome and encourage other suggestions as to how to better develop these processes.

We are not offering a path to reconciliation to Pidgein / Violet at this time but remain open to revisiting this ban at a later date contingent upon Pidgein / Violet's ongoing good faith engagement in such a discussion and a clear demonstration of Pidgein / Violet's commitment to the overall community’s health and well-being.

Centi has abided by all agreements made and is an active contributor to the Omni community. We do not, at this time, find his presence to provide a negative impact on the community.

discussion

• jenny: conflict's been going on for 5 months. i stepped in january with ryan rising as mediator. then niki replaced ryan. [jenny summarizes the document, reads the recommendations]
• dk: thank you for all your work. tremendous amount of work. and for writing it clearly. very grateful. such thankless work.
• ryan: also we love you
• jesse: i see how challenging this is. it appears violet isn't able to seek compromise. i see that too. details of outcome are very relevant to me.
• yar: humans and other individuals who agree with the recommendations: 8/8 including all delegates. consensed with quorum.
• jesse: would like a short meeting
• jenny: thank you jesse for facilitating our hardest meeting ever
• ryan: also thank you note takers
• some discussion of the policy about conflicting parties or accused safe space violaters attending the delegates meetings
• discussing feedback on the process
• centi [not here] suggests never bringing conflictees to the meetings to air dirty laundry in front of strangers
• ryan: also inappropriate to bring outside advocators just to support you
• niki: i disagree because it's importnat to feel supported by your community
• ryan: correction, they shouldn't be speaking overmmuch if they were not witness to the conflicts in the space as they're not participants in the community
• yar wonders what makes them not members of the community. they are friends of my friends...
• lea: lots of talk about starting a survivors group here. is that something someone has taken on?
• niki: i'm willing to hold the space, but i don't identify as a survivor myself and don't really consider it appropriate.
• ryan: as a survivor, i don't think the omni is the appropriate space for this - because it's inclusive. even in exclusive spaces it's common for perpetrators to infilitrate survivors groups and i'd hate to see that happen to the omni. would rather see cdc make headway on making the space less of a minefield.
• ryan: until i can come here without being groped - having people rub my shoulders or pat me on the head - i don't think we can have a survivors' group. plain and simple.
• dk: well maybe there could be another meeting about htis
• yar: i've just been prioritizing being polite instead of being honest
• ryan: i keep not bringing it up because i'm tired of being "a problem" at the omni
• jesse: i don't want this to be a refuge or perfect or fundamentalist. it's the first year, it's brand new. you are all the omni. everything is in constnat flux. we have to take responsibliity for what that means. it's totally conceptual. hard to invent this thing on a day to day bases.
• ryan: that attitude is exactly the problem because the people who need this space the most are the ones with the least energy, the ones being assaulted and facing violnece, being yelled at. saying you need to put in a ton of work means the people with the most energy and the most privilege are the ones coopting the space by tyrrany of majority. our policy isn't enforcable because if you say anything "negative" you get people jumping on your case. nick assaulted me, kneed me in the back. i had 3 people telling me don't bring it up because you should just "work it out". because i kept my mouth shut it became a larger problem in the community and now people are trapping me in conversation for 1.5 hours telling me it's all my problem and yelling at me until i'm crying. that's our culture. i'm sick of it. i've been brought to tears and having flashbacks because of things that aren't in my control. the whole "you just need to put the work in" is a tyrrany of majority of people iwth power and i'm sick of it.
• jesse: i feel empathy but also scolded and lectured like somehow i'm supposed to fix it. i'm here 2-4 days of my week, been donig that for 6-7 months. i do a lot of self care and make sure my shit's together and keep coming back. don't feel like i can do more. don't want to do less. we can't all be here. i can't make sure bad people don't come through the doors. how can we have ingenuity & synergy and an open door policy and also a controlled envionrment? doesn't seem possible. i'm not saying just get over it, please don't take that. i feel like maybe it's time for disappointment and deciding it isn't what you thought it is. maybe it's not better or worse or just different.
• ryan: then on paper we need to change our values. if we're not going to uphold our values, we should get rid of them.
• dk: one thing i've noticed, there's the values and aspirations we have and then there's upholding them. getting those two things to align - they're not all one and the same thing. we may all share similar values but it an be very difficult to uphold them. to me i se that as more of a problem to figure out. we're purposly trying not to set up a system in which we're policing people's behavior. ideally we should be absorbing a culture, like stepping into someone's home you have a graciousness. but because we can't be here all the time we're forced into a situation where we can't uphold our values all of the time, that leads to a sense of hopelessness and can burn people out. I see the challenges as enacting those values.
• ryan: i think that's factually incorrect. there's things we've prohibited. people grope me. we got rid of them. but in order to keep people from fighting me i had to specify. the problem isn't enforcement, it's that if i enforce it i'm treated by esteemed community members as a bad person. i dont' have the energy [pad cuts out] joe has verbally assaulted people about how they shouldn't have done this.
• jesse: i feel you're fed up and you've already worked hard at this. you feel ignored and violated and possibly used. my feeling is from where you're at it's hard to come out in a way that is gonna like ... i'm not sure where to help it become more positive for you because it alreayd seems like you've had so much negative experience and i'm curious why you keep coming back
• rayn: i don't feel ignored. the opposite. i feel ike someone is watching my every attempt to do anything in this community, like if i bring up that someone did something not ok to me, i'll have immediate negative backlasth. why do i keep comign here? because i want to believe this community will actually do what it's intended to on paper. not for cis white men to sit and do whatever they want to do. it's supposed to be for people hwo are oppressed in our community to have a space where they could be.
• jesse: IME it is. i've seen that in a lot of ways. we can have differente experiences. not to challenge you, i believe yourexperinece is just as true as mine. becasue there's so much physical space int he building i'm leaving ht epossibility for so many different thigns.
• ryan: i completely disagree
• niki: thank you ryan for sharing. your voice is important. daily i think about how we deal with intersectionality here. example of person earlier is also expeireincing multiple forms of oppression. how do we choose who to support in which situation? how can we support you in that moment and also him?
• ryan: it's very simple. i told him on tuesday not to touch me, i told him today. he didn't react to that. why didn't anyone do anything? i brought it up repeatedly. i feel like there's no support, people are afraid to show solidarity. it's frustrating. literally.
• yar: i am. it's true.
• niki: you're right. not always fear but i often feel conflicted. even with my own conflicts. esp with people oppressed differnetly from me. idk the answer. continue to have conversations. doesn't feel cut & dried in practice for everything.
• yar: people exploit that goodwill on purpose. it's called gaslighting.
• ryan: i'd love to see people just call out touch all the itme. "hey did you ask for consent?"
• jesse: i've never seen any of this. haven't even seen violent activity on the street. idk what you're talking about. that's meant to call you out actually. idgi. i'm here a lot. i have to go. i'm sorry.
• dk: part of aligning practice to values is tricky. overall it's not straightforward. in yoru case yes but in other cases no. you're right to call out fear & conflict avoidance. when things are clearly not acceptable people should say something. it's deep cuz lots of ppl don't knwo what our policy is. i'd wager most present righ tnow haven't read any of our policies. deep. hard to fix. next CDC meeting let's talk about a better culture. of really supporting one another. so you're heard. suggestions would be great.
• ryan: phrase SSP originated in gay community. meant certain places would put pink triangle on their window. we have nothing besides the policy that says it except that i put it on the door. before stepping foot in here people need to have something they can see showing we have a standard of behavior and they should find out what that is as soon as possible.
• dk: we talked a lot about that. i'd love to move forward maybe at another meeting about proactive things
• lea: wasn't there talk about greeters?
• niki & jenny: people don't volunteer and don't show up if you want to help with this!
• dk: no real agenda
• niki: orientation is important but connected to lots of issues such as access, openness, when people are allowed to be here, who they're allowed to bring. for instance, members with guests with guests, etc. chain of different issues. also thinking about welcoming pepole from wider community who aren't as literate in radical language. problematic to say there's no place for them here. we want to be in solidarity with underserved populations.
• ryan: most SSP terms can be in simple english - "don't touch without asking" is something most people can understand, and can be translated. if you're a person who honestly doesn't care about the community, are you going to go to an orientation? most people involved in conflicts are people who wouldn't go to an orientation anyway.
• how to cultivate basic solidarity?
  • should we coordinate a meeting just about this?
  • yar: a small seed of strong trust is really the first step
  • dk: what could we do in some tangible way?
  • ryan: un-meeting? where anyone could fork the meeting?
  • niki: how about the 13th, the week after lynice's discussion with CDC?
  • niki: there's also the interstitial meetings we've been having on Sunday evenings to talk about our conflict resolution process. those began as mediation with kwe. i wouldn't recommend coming to them - they're very aggressive.
  • ryan: wondering why kwe hasn't been banned by now? we've banned people just for sleeping in the space, far less frequently than he has. much less being aggressive on top of it all.

Omni Ground Rules

• Submitted by David Brazil 5/26

The Omni must have clear and posted rules about what is not permitted in the space. We need a sign prominently posted at each entrance, in the bathrooms, and in other places as appropriate.

Here is a draft of language for such a sign :

NO VIOLENCE; NO THREATS; NO HARASSMENT; NO SHOUTING; NO DRUGS; NO SLEEPING. ANYONE FOUND BREAKING THESE RULES WILL BE ASKED TO LEAVE.

THE OMNI DOES NOT ALLOW PERSONAL STORAGE, SOLICITATION, UNLEASHED DOGS, OR MATERIAL DONATIONS WITHOUT PRIOR APPROVAL.

We can word the signs however we like but we have to be crystal-clear about expectations and consequences. Every community space in Oakland and elsewhere has dealt with these issues and the Omni will be no exception. With compassion and love, we have to deal with these things clearly and firmly.

Laura's friendly edits:

NO VIOLENCE; NO THREATS; NO HARASSMENT; NO SHOUTING; NO DRUGS, NO CANDLES OR INCENSE. NO TOUCHING OF OTHER PEOPLE WITHOUT ASKING FIRST.

THE OMNI DOES NOT ALLOW: SLEEPING (INCLUDING NAPS), PERSONAL STORAGE, SOLICITATION, UNLEASHED DOGS, OR MATERIAL DONATIONS WITHOUT PRIOR APPROVAL.

ANYONE FOUND BREAKING THESE RULES WILL BE ASKED TO LEAVE.

Discussion

Meeting-wide discussion of issues, concerns, ideas, etc.

For Next Week

Any Proposals or Discussions which were tabled for lack of time, etc.

End of Meeting

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